Imagine ur self in a Sprite Ad

Your Colleague : Hey!! Kya yahan baitha mail forward karta rahta
hai yaar !! Naye packages dekh.... Naye language seekh. Night out
...Fundoo programming kar like me....! Do something cool man !!

You : Achha! To usse Kya hoga ..

Your Colleague : Impression!!! Appraisal !!!
Har appraisal main tu No 1!
Hike in salary !! Extra Stocks

You : Phir kya hoga...

Your Colleague : Project Leader ban jaayega..Phir Project Manager
!!!Phir Business Manager ! One day U will be a
Director of the Company man !!

You : Acchha to phir kya hoga...

Your Colleague : Abe phir tu aish karega! Koi kaam nahin karna
padega ! Araam se office aayega aur MAIL check
karega.

You : To ab main kya kar raha hoon????

"Dikhawe pe na jao, apni akal lagao.
Programming hai waste, trust only copy-paste "

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ENGINEERING DAYS MEMORIES

Reminds us of those engineering days.... 4 years of non-stop of what follows... day after day...

Engineering Dialogues

1. On being Late
(standing at the door... gesturing to a friend) "Andar aaon kya? Kab chalu hua?"
"Attendance ho gaya kya??"
"I was searching for the Classroom"
"Bus/Train was late"
"bike/scooter kharab ho gaya tha."

2. During the lecture
"mera assignment tere paas hai??"
"Kya bore ho raha hai. Bola tha bunk karenge."
"Heads, we go home, Tails, we go home now!!!"
"Journal sheet hai??"

3. Lab
"Expt. 2 likha??"
"Idhar Karna kya hai??"

4. Unit Test
"Aaj kounsa test hai?"
"Oh !!! Itna syllabus cover ho gaya ?"

5. For attendance
(less attendance isliye attendance badane ke liye bahane)
"I forgot the I-card , so watchman didn ' t let me in"

6. Late submission of assignments
" Maine usko bola thaa ki copy karke mera assgnment bhi saath mein submit kar dena"
"Last date extend hua thaa"
"I didn ' t know the last date"

7. Late submission of Journal (for printouts)
"Format pataa nahi thaa"
"Printer is not working today"
"Friday ko light nahi thee"

8. VIVA (after exam)
"Yeh bhi syllabus mein thaa kya?"
"Achha !!! ye aise hota hai kya?"
"Ye subject ka reference book kounsa hai"

9. VIVA (b4 exam)
"Submission ab tak hua nahi hai , VIVA kya ghanta doonga"
"Dekh Boss!! external bhi aadmi hai. Usko pata hai students ka ab tak preparation nahi hua hai"

10. VIVA (General)
"Dekh , tu jo bhi padhega , woh (external) tereko woh nahi poochhnewaala, then watz the point"
"Roll no. 1 aur 2 ko wapas bulaaya hai"
"External is asking Bermuda Triangle ka Magnetic force kitna hai"
"Ye kounse subject mein aata hai"
"Aaj kounsa Viva hai?"

11. Submission
"Ye bhi chhapna hai kya?"
"Iska bhi print-out lena hai kya?"
"Tujhe Sir ka sign aata hai kya?"

12. A convo:
"Ye tune kya likha hai????"
"Jo word samajh mein aa raha hai woh likh, jo nahi samajh mein aa raha hai uska drawing nikal"
"Phir bhi, kuch to idea hoga??"
" Maine uska likha hai, mera assignment check ho gaya , tu bhi wohi kar. Jo word samajh mein araha hai woh likh , jo nahi samajh mein aa raha hai woh chhod de."

13. Exam
"Jo (mujhe)aata hai, woh (paper mein)aata nahi hai; jo nahi aata hai woh aata hai"
"ye question 2 saal se nahi poochha hai"
"ye last time hi poochha thaa"
"tere paas iske notes hai??"
"woh chapter... mark weightage 6 marks... (facial ex-pressions speaks the story)"
"nahi samjha to rat le"
(when someone is intensively doing his last revision) "Yeh nahi aayega !!!"

too funny..

Newton - The Father of Physics committed suicide.
Do you know why?
Here is the reason.

Once he came to India and He watched a few Tamil movies and had his head
spinning. He was convinced that all his logics and laws in physics were
just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done. In
the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he
went paranoid. Here are a few scenes:

1) Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors
can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights,
our great Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's
surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the
tumor along with it and he is cured. Long Live Rajanikanth.

2) In one of the movies, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3
gangsters. Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet.

Guess, what he does... He holds a knife in his hand and throws

at the middle gangster & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The

knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces and kills both the gangsters
on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle
one.

3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver
but he has no bullets in it. Guess what he does. Nah not even in
your remotest imaginations.

He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster
shoots, Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver
and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and

fires his gun.
Bang

and the gangster dies..
This was too much for our Newton to take and he was completely
shaken and he decided to go back. But he happened to see a movie
for one last time and thought that at least one movie will follow his
theory of physics.
The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world
hasn't changed.

Oops not so fast.
The Climax finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know that the
villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that
Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman

techniques that our heroes normally use. Rajanikanth has to
desperately kill the villain because it�s the climax.


(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible).
Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pocket (Probably a backup).
He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached the
height of the wall, he shoots at the trigger of the first gun in
air, with his second gun. Now the first gun fires off and the
villain is dead.

Newton commits Suicide.
Ragnikant ki jay ho !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Realize - The value!!!

To realize

The value of a sister

Ask someone

Who doesn't have one.

To realize

The value of ten years:

Ask a newly

Divorced couple.

To realize

The value of four years:

Ask a graduate.

To realize

The value of one year:

Ask a student

whoHas failed a final exam.

To realize

The value of nine months:

Ask a mother

who gave birth to a still born.

To realize

The value of one month:

Ask a mother

who has given birth to

A premature baby.

To realize

The value of one week:

Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize

The value of one hour:

Ask the lovers

who are waiting to Meet.

To realize

The value of one minute:

Ask a person

Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize

The value of one-second:

Ask a person

Who has survived an accident...

To realize

The value of one millisecond:

Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.

You will treasure it even more when

you can share it with someone special.

To realize

the value of a friend:

Lose one.

Did you know?

Did you know that those who appear to be very strong in heart, are real weak and most susceptible?

Did you know that those who spend their time protecting others are the ones that really need someone to protect them?

Did you know that the three most difficult things to say are:

I love you, Sorry and help me

Did you know that those who dress in red are more confident in themselves?

Did you know that those who dress in yellow are those that enjoy their beauty?

Did you know that those who dress in black, are those who want to be unnoticed and need your help and understanding?

Did you know that when you help someone, the help is returned in two folds?

Did you know that it's easier to say what you feel in writing than saying it to someone in the face? But did you know that it has more value when you say it to their face?

Did you know that if you ask for something in faith, your wishes are granted?

Did you know that you can make your dreams come true, like falling in love, becoming rich, staying healthy, if you ask for it by faith, and if you really knew, you'd be surprised by what you could do.

But don't believe everything I tell you, until you try it for yourself, if you know someone that is in need of something that I mentioned, and you know that you can help, you'll see that it will be returned in two-fold.